Tomorrow is Easter Day, or I would rather call it Resurrection Day.
The day where Jesus rose again 3 days afer being cruxified on the cross.
Early childhood Easter days were a fun time during church. We will get presents and definitely an easter egg to go with. When I started to grow up, Good Fridays became more 'useful' as we started to treasure holidays and tend to look forward to such.
Years past by and we come to year 2014. On the Good Friday this year, I had planned to bring my parents to a good lunch at their favourite porridge stall at busy Chinatown. I went to sleep the night before, not knowing what the next day would actually be like.
I awoke naturally, a bit bemoaning the fact that i had not caught on more sleep than usual. Before long, my mother came in and said that my brother had called and there was a family event today. Together with some of my aunties and uncles, there will be a visit to the columbariums and graves of my grandparents as well as my late Uncle Teng. Without too much pondering, i readily agreed to it.
While changing clothes, I noticed that the sky was pitch dark and will rain very soon. We quickly prepared and took our umbrellas and off we went downstairs to wait for my brother, who would come very quickly to pick us up.
As we entered the car not too long ago, rain started to fall.
Inside the car, my Uncle Beng was as usual chatting non stop. Everyone was feeling still fresh and was looking forward to offer our respects later. When we reached the Christian Cemetery at my Grandpa's it was still raining heavily. Along the narrow paths leading to the site, I could see some others who , despite the onpouring rain, remain steadfast in their decision to come out of their cars and crowd around their late but not forgotten ones.
As we reached the site of my grandpa's, we decided to wait a while in the car while my aunt Hong has yet to arrive. A silence in the car allowed me to get away in my own thoughts for a while as i peered far to where my grandpa's tomb lay.
I may be the least expressive and i am very sure i may have not said this to my grandpa ever; that I love and respect him deeply. Not that i grew up and started to know what a great man he was now. But i already knew it long ago, just that being an adult has allowed me to be able to further feel that.
I had always felt bad to my grandpa and a tinge of regret as i remembered i threw one rare tantrum at him just before he was soon to be warded for a heart by pass operation. I just felt so sorry that i hadn't the chance to say i m sorry and i swept his hand away after he had tried to sayang me after knocking onto my nose while trying to prepare some drink for me.
The silence was quickly disturbed by a message on my brother's phone. It was an apps message to the chat group which my uncles and aunties had created. Only my brother among my many cousins was inside the group as he was the eldest grandson and he would then pass on the message from the top.
Decision was to visit my great grandparents columnbariums at nearby Choa Chu Kang as the rain was too heavy for us to get down.
Soon, we reached the place. Rain had started to get smaller and i was impressed as marshallers were stationed to direct traffic, perhaps knowing Good Friday would be another busy day for relatives to give respect to the late ones, despite the recent Qin Ming festival which had passed on about a week ago. Perhaps it was just a holiday which people decided to chance upon, maybe some were busy the week before.
As we made our way there, i suddenly remembered seeing my great grand parents pictures in the big living hall of my grandpa's house at Duke's Road. Although it was so many years after they have shifted out of Duke's Road, i have several fond memories of the place, even as it stood still waiting for demolition the last time i went back to have a last look. We sang my grandpa's favourite gospel song and also read Psalm 23. Quick references were also made, pictures taken to ensure we will know where the columbariums are so it will be easier to locate in future.
Soon it was already 1130am. We next made our way back to my Grandpa's, whom i feel , even up to today, was the man everyone in my Chua Family loved and deeply respected. While my grandma had some 'crosses' among some of the family members before and may not have made certain decisions better, my grandpa certainly have no such problems among my uncles and aunties. Never have i ever heard any of them complaining about my grandpa. Whatever he said, all held in high regard and never questioned. Even up till now, the several blank and devastated faces i seen on my uncles and aunties at my grandpa's funeral, i could not forget.
As we reached the site again, rain had stopped totally. Sun was bright and air was humid.
As we stood around my Grandpa's tombstone after years since i last visited it, i just felt like the small boy again, waiting near my grandpa as he stood in his favourite sofa in the living room. We sang the same song and read Psalm 23 again. To me and perhaps some of our family members, i have taken Psalm 23 with me as i grew, even if i had fallen off course from church on times. This Psalm was written by David who was was one of the closest to God in the Bible. It is a very heart warming Psalm which gives comfort and strength always.
My uncle, Pastor Yen Ming then spoke briefly on the coming of Jesus soon and the recent Blood Moon in the eclipse was evident that soon, Jesus shall come again. Despite the several different schools of though in Christianity, the coming of Jesus has always been evident and on the thoug hof several christians. The day that Jesus comes again, the dead shall be resurrected and be taken up to heaven together with the living ones. What a sight that would be.
As we will soon leave for lunch at Westlake before droppin over at my Uncle Teng, i touched on my grandpa's tombstone and felt much better. Although I always felt sorry that I didnt apologise to him, i remembered i was at the hospital bed just before he went for the operation. I remembered my mother cooking chicken rice and I was walking around his bed. I cant remember saying anything but i m sure my presence around his bed would have assured him i am okay, and just throwing a silly tantrum.
As we went back into the car, i realised that my grandpa could very well be making the drink for me, knowing he might not have another chance to do it again should the operation fail. However, as with all regrets, one might say there is no turning back.
However, in our christian world, we believe in the Resurrection. Just as Jesus rose on the third day, i believe i will see my grandpa one day again and i will have the chance to say to him what i had wanted all these years.
Happy Easter Day!
Signed off Mr USsenal
Signed off Mr USsenal